Mead, Simmel, and Goffman: Self, Identity, and Social Roles
Mead’s Stages of the Self: I and Me
George Herbert Mead believed that other people play a significant role in how we view ourselves, but only certain people can influence our perception of self, and only during certain periods of life. Mead believed that infants and very young children are not influenced by others. Instead, he believed that young children see themselves as being the focus of their own world and, consequently, they don’t care about what other people think of them. However, Mead also believed that as we grow up, our beliefs about how other people perceive us start to become more important. This happens through three distinct stages:
- The Preparatory Stage: Children initially engage in imitation, lacking a developed sense of self.
- The Play Stage: Children start to take on the roles of others (e.g., playing house), showing an awareness of social relationships.
- The Game Stage: Children understand the attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors of the “generalized other” (society as a whole). They recognize that people act based on societal expectations, not just personal beliefs.
The “I” and the “Me”
Mead believed that understanding the generalized other leads to the development of the “I” and the “me.”
- The “Me”: Our social self; how we believe the generalized other sees us. It represents learned behaviors, attitudes, and expectations.
- The “I”: Our response to the “me.” It is the individual’s identity, stepping in, representing personal responses and interpretations of societal expectations.
For example, the “me” might understand that people in the US typically go from high school directly to college. The “I” might question if that is best, considering alternatives like traveling or working first. The “me” represents society’s view, while the “I” represents the individual’s response. Mead believed that our actual self is a balance of both the “I” and the “me.”
Simmel: The Stranger as a Social Role
For Georg Simmel, the stranger is a social role that combines nearness and remoteness. The stranger may be a close confidant because their social distance prevents harsh judgment. Simmel differentiates the stranger from both the “outsider” (who has no specific relation to a group) and the “wanderer” (who comes today and leaves tomorrow). The stranger comes today and stays tomorrow, a member of the group who remains distant from others.
Goffman: Performance and Impression Management
Erving Goffman used the term ‘performance’ to refer to all the activity of an individual in front of a particular set of observers, or audience. Through this performance, the individual, or actor, gives meaning to themselves, to others, and to their situation. These performances deliver impressions to others, communicating information that confirms the actor’s identity in that situation. The actor may or may not be aware of their performance, but the audience constantly attributes meaning to it.
Me = Society’s opinion of things
I = My response to society’s opinion